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. three streams!“What the hell is that?” “War wound. Germany, bullet in the penis, left three holes”.The two veterans then look over at the gu... in the middle and see... 12 streams!“War wound??” “Nah my zipper’s stuck”A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. “Boy, I’d give anything to sink this putt” the golfer mumbles to himself.Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers “Would you be willing to give up a quarter of your sex life to sink. ”“Well I like her too. I never had a sister and it has been a joy having her in my life. Do you have a girl that is your best friend?”“Not like a sister. I have a few friends, but the girls are interested in things that don’t interest me.”“How do you like America so far?”“It is really different. America is not like they say it is at school. The people are not all fat and they are not all loud. I like the music more.”“Would you ever want to live here?”“Oh yes! I would love to come and live with. You are not going to sleep on a pull-out. My bed is your bed, and you will be my first lover.”I was gobsmacked, I had secretly been infatuated with her since I found out girls did not have cooties. I gently grabbed her hand and leaned in and kissed her.The night was everything I could have wanted. Mary was an enthusiastic lover and said that she did not have any pain when we made love.When Mary graduated that June, she informed any and all who would listen that she was going to the same college. Connor decided to have a look at the present Vince hadgotten him. It was the first time he really got a present. It was afirst time for a lot of things for Connor, and for once they were allamazing things. A lot different than the other firsts Vince had givenhim, like the first time he actually got his head flushed in a toiletbowl.Opening up his present Connor was once again surprised it wasn?t just asimple gift like he had been expecting. It was the latest model iPhonewith the biggest memory.
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